It's noisy in here!

As I said in this post Deep Dark Confessions I'm fascinated by Bethenny Frankel's book "A Place of Yes".  We already talked about rule #1 Break the Chain.  Today I want to tackle a few of her 10 rules at once:

2. Find your Truth
3. Act on it
4. Everything is your business

In order to achieve the second rule finding your truth, you have to clear alot of noise.  Noise is the BS that we carry that isn't ours that keeps us from the truth.  I'm sure we'll talk about noise again and again.  There are two main types of noise I want to discuss today in relationship to these rules:  Relationship Noise and Perfectionist Noise

This book is hilarious, Bethenny is a recovering serial monogamist like me.  Moved from one relationship to the other without any personal growth space in between.  She talks so openly about owning up to the relationships we've had and the value of exploring the truth about them. 

I never owned up or opened up to my daughter about her biological father (sperm donor as we call him).  This subject is ripe for it's own blog another day.  The short version is that I haven't seen him since the day I told him I was pregnant 22 years ago.  Opening up to her and my husband about this relationship (or really the lack thereof) was a huge healing!  I'm a bit raw yet liberated!  My husband was wise beyond belief when he pointed out that my noise keeps me from calling him by his given name.  RAY and I were not a couple, it started out a party and ended in pain both physical and emotional.  Lots more work to do on this one but owning it, acting on it and making it my business to get to the truth reaps huge rewards. 

Perfectionist noise is pretty self explanatory.  Here's my favorite quote from this chapter:  "You must find the line between high standards for yourself and destructive perfectionist noise".  Amen Sister!  If only it were that easy!  HA HA  In my spiritual training they call it perfect pictures.  Whatever you want to call it, I'm fraught with it head to toe.  Knowing that truth is essential to clearing it.  Balancing this area is so hard!  I sabbotage alot of things because I can't achieve perfect.  I also lose a lot of wars because I let the perfectionist noise take over one individual battle.  I will find that line one of these days.

I won't lie, it's frustrating to have these extra layers of crap.  Damn, clearing them feels like a canon ball into a cool lake on a hot day.  Free yourself of the noise that bogs you down.  Find YOU in there and BE YOU.  Love yourself no matter what you did or didn't do.  Accept YOU just as YOU ARE!!